March 2011
52 posts
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The Ataris — “My Hotel Year”
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YOU REEL ME OUT THEN YOU CUT THE STRING
I do not like him. He is selfish; he is arrogant; he uses people, and he is inconsiderate. He is greedy and indecisive. He cannot have us all. I try to be near him as much as possible.
I am on his couch, letting him push me over, but then he just lays there, breathing me in until I become restless and sit up. My face is inches away from his, smiling, waiting, until I get restless and run away....
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This is the story
When I told you that I had dreamt about you I left something out. In the dream, your hands aflame, we were drawn together, closer than ever before and you told me, you asked me (you made yourself know that you’d like me) to be faithful. You knew of my background, and while no true philandering had ever taken place in my history, you warned me, really that I had one shot, and to make it...
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She sat at her dining room table crying over something or another. The minimal makeup that she wore was spread out on her cheeks. It was something that had nothing to do with you. Something that you couldn’t necessarily fix, but wanted to try. I wanted her to let me in. Interstellar, Interstate. I dial up and across the telephone lines, a love song plays while I’m on hold. It sounds...
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Lack Of Updates
Haven’t really updated in the past week or so, mainly because I’ve been busy with work, moving (back to Brooklyn!), a slight cold and lack of time/internet connection.
It snowed today, but summer is coming, and I hope to melt like butter.
Anonymous asked: i type in all lowercase, is that ok?
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alexrosexvi-deactivated20111119 asked: is there any chance you could post a picture of what you look like? i've kinda always wondered... x
Anonymous asked: your music is delicious. if i lived in the city, i'd never leave you alone.
findingelysium asked: What would you have done differently?
imzackjones-deactivated20120205 asked: Do you play music? what do you listen to ?
fridayimacat asked: Sorry if you've been asked this a million times but how did it end?
caprile asked: Do you feel proud at what you have accomplished? The creation of a cathartic space for so many people who can relate to what you once felt?
Anonymous asked: Do you think that people might be better (I use better loosely) if they had a chance to grow from very intense heartbreak?
Anonymous asked: How do you feel about her now?
Do you miss her?
Do you miss her?
neverr-growup asked: i LOVE your blog! do you think you could write some more about her leaving? love reading them :)
I might have had a few beers, so I'll be taking... →
don’t make me regret this.
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Tumbleweeds
It was always important for me, that whoever I dated that they be their own person; I had dated girls who had tried to make me into something I was not, and still am not, and I have dated girls who tried to change themselves into who they thought I wanted them to be. All I wanted was a girl that could silence me with a look and put me in my place with a few calculated words, I wanted someone that...
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When You Go Anywhere
An early phone call had awoken me. I felt suddenly wired from my deep sleep, and especially more seeing as who it was. She said, “I’m leaving now.” It’s funny how you almost don’t really believe anything big will happen until it does. Life always seems to be mostly talk. Your wedding will come, it’s true. You’ll find your love, and then have children....
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THE PAST IS THE PAST AND I SHOULD HAVE KEPT YOU...
You look really good, just as I explicitly remember from the last time I saw you. Your hair and your scruff and that light in your eyes is still the same. I bet your hands still feel the same and I bet you still sound and taste the same, too. You look exactly like before but nothing is actually like before, is it now? Do you still smell of cigarette smoke? I hated when you would pull me into your...
Anonymous asked: What do you agree is most effective, making a guy work for your attention, or giving him the time of day, even if he's slightly big headed?
Anonymous asked: I have a question. What do you do when your boyfriend broke up with you, he hates you for no reason, he doesn't talk to you, he found a new girl, and you're still completely in love with him?
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Anonymous asked: I think I'm in love with you.
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Interiors
Today I worked real real hard and on my walk home I was texting all my friends, and I’m feeling happy. Satisfied. I realized that I know some incredibly amazing people who are doing seriously radical things.
Tonight, in like 30 minutes Aaron is premiering his film, Apart at SXSW and like 3 times I’ve thought about it I’ve almost got tears in my eyes. SO proud.
Donald’s book, Let Me Make You A...
ssuspiciouss asked: Are you in NY? What should my friend and I do?!
thisisntwhatyouthink asked: Im interested now, will you post a picture of yourself as a girl, and one as a guy? That sounds weird but I think you know what I mean, lol. :3
Anonymous asked: foe some really strange reason, i just always pictured you as a girl.
then i found out you aren't. i feel very strange.
i love your blog nonetheless.
:D
then i found out you aren't. i feel very strange.
i love your blog nonetheless.
:D
lovelaceinjuly asked: I half expect this to sit in with your countless messages for ages, and all I want to ask is your name.
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Austin Lucas — “Go West”
I...
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Since She Left
has a lot of Asian readers and I hope that you’re all ok in light of the earthquake.
We hope that you’re with someone you care for right now.
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Fewer and further apart.
I’ve been writing about you less often and I miss it. I think I miss it even more than I miss you. I miss writing about love, life, pain, hope, hurt and strength. I miss the satisfaction I felt when every word fell right into place and my fingers moved across the keyboard seamlessly, I miss the feeling I got after I pressed post and I saw what I had just written on my dash, I miss the few people...
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4.23.09
katieileen:
i have a shirt that falls off my shoulders and i wear it because you like it, it was your favorite even if i wasn’t. you said you liked my skin and how it was hiding, i wanted to touch you but you were too close. i keep my heart locked away in a box under your bed but you moved three years ago and you don’t know where ‘home’ is anymore, did you ever? i have a heart and it has your...
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I've Tried But...
laddertospace:
I just can’t get myself to regret him.
You don’t have to regret him. You just have to acknowledge him as a legitimate part of your past and plan your future accordingly.
sheisjustthinking asked: Hello - I don't have a question, but I just wanted to let you know that I absolutely love your blog. It has helped me through so much because i can relate in some way or another to almost everything that is posted. So thank you for having this blog! Keep it up! :-)
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I was tossing pennies into the rain, listening to you ramble, you always rambled. You turned your head to me and laughed. I told you I didn’t like pennies, like maybe they’re worthless, and you said I was someone someone could love. I knew if anyone was capable of loving me, it was you, because I’d never ask you to and I was always asking for love, because maybe I’m those...
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noneofusfeelsgood asked: if i submit something and luckily chosen, can I use this for my college application??
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WatchThis is a late Follow/FYI Friday.
You may have noticed that over the year and a half that this blog has been in existence there have been a few names that I keep mentioning every time I do a follow Friday. This is because I have strong convictions and when I believe in something, I really believe in something. One name that hopefully you’ll remember is Aaron Rottinghaus. Aaron is, in all...
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We were sitting on the rocks at the mountain peak, moonlight sifting golden shapes over the water, wind cradling laughter for that little bit longer. It was late. Darkness dragged the silhouettes below, their movements gradual like they were dancing and maybe they were. We were nowhere. We were happy. Not the overpowering kind of happy or the kind the disappears in an instant either. No, we...
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Snapshots from a rock 'n' roll marriage -... →
“Before the Black Keys won Grammys, before the drunken fights and infidelity — Patrick and I were very much in love.”
I really love this article.
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I have spent a great deal of time, too much perhaps, reflecting upon the beauty of broken things. Broken, like tufts of dandelion fruit carried upon the wind. Broken, like the jagged edge of smashed glass. Broken, like thoughts ~ yours ~ I once felt upon my skin, in the darkness, as I lay next to you. Broken, like an empty space that has taken your shape. Broken, like the comfort and rest I once...
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