Coke Talk of the Day

Ugh. My whole world is sore abs and yogurt.

I’m on an obligatory and highly ritualized post break-up diet and exercise regimen. Cliché, I know, but I prefer to externalize my pain, and it’s a helluva lot healthier than going on a four day coke binge in the Marilyn Suite.

Sure, this is a little bit of my crazy showing, but fuck it. Right now I need my muscles to ache more than my heart.

Everyone who knows me thinks I’m good with break-ups. All they see is surface calm, and they assume the best. In a way, they’re right. I’m strong. I’m dealing with it. Still, this shit hurts.

I’ve really missed him these past few weeks. We talk on the phone most days and still have plans to see each other, but I’ve come to feel his absence.

It’s okay, though. That’s what’s supposed to happen now. Besides, it’s in that absence that I’m able to appreciate how much of himself he gave me when we were together.

Not that I didn’t deserve it, but damn, he really did know how to show a girl some undivided attention. For a while there, we were the only two people on earth.

It takes a lot to make me that cheesy.

I’ll always love him for it.

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