She looks so sweet, I know. But man, I should have...

She looks so sweet, I know. But man, I should have know better.

From day one, when she got dumped on valentines day and we started dating shortly thereafter. From the time we fucked ALL NIGHT (6 times for me, you know for reference) at her parent’s house, with just the pocket door slid closed, no lock.

From the day she moved in to my place and didn’t help unpack. I should have known better.

We got engaged. Fucking engaged. And still, I was totally blinded by the light. Because when she was on, she was fucking on. She could do things for me that I never knew were possible. Then shit hit the fan, and she moved to Seattle (where she could wear a beanie everyday, undoubtedly) and moved in with some metro dude, I was baffled.

Now she’s moved back to town, and I’m terrified that I’ll run into her, which I will. Why? Why you ask? Because she “was the one”, at that time in my life. It hasn’t even been two years, and I’m terrified that I’ll see her and still have all those feelings for her, that I’ll say we should go for coffee, and go back to my mother’s house, which is empty aside from two beds, and we’d fuck like the old times, and then we’d be back together. She’s just as good as that fucking heroin that used to find it’s way into my nose, and other randomly placed holes in my body.

I think it’s because she completely knows how to manipulate people, in such a way that everyone loves her, and they’ll do anything for her. Well maybe I still love her, maybe I still love them all, but this one is different. I’ve never felt like such a fucking stud around here, never felt so good, yet so scared of losing her. Which is probably why I lost her.

I should know better.